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for Passion and Romance in your Life
How to Repel the Opposite Sex
by T. O' Donnelll
There is a war between the sexes. This war is based on a
misunderstanding. The misunderstanding is this:
Women think that men think like women.
Men think that women think like men.
A woman does this:
Prepares a meal of food she likes - bitter, lean, salady,
light, and expects her date to like it;
Borrows a romantic DVD, with plenty of crying;
Wears a scent she likes;
Dresses to please her mainly female colleagues;
Keeps company with women, and acts in solidarity with
them;
Trades secrets with other women, and feels empowered by
so doing;
Has deep and wide-ranging feelings;
Is concerned with the feelings of those around her;
Abhors dirt and disorder;
Rages and cries at the smallest thing, once a month;
Words mean whatever she's feeling at the time. A man
does this:
Not too fussed about food - likes heavy, sweet, stodgy
grub;
Borrows an action or comic DVD, with no sob-stuff;
A quick wash under the armpits and we're good to go;
Dresses to intimidate other men;
Happily keeps company with men, women, criminals, a dog,
anything, as long as it doesn't talk too much;
Trades mock punches, slaps on the back, cruel jokes, and
has a good laugh;
One mood, all the time;
Is not too bothered about other people's feelings,
unless he's done something really bad;
Secretly enjoys living in his own filth;
Last cried a few years ago, and did it in private;
Words mean as the dictionary defines them.
Now, how can these two distinct creatures ever get
together? Simple. Each has to start thinking like the
other, just a little bit. Each has to research the
other's fantasy world, and reflect it back to the object
of desire.
A good source of research is the magazine rack in your
local supermarket. Men should look at womens' magazines,
and vice-versa. Men will discover that women fantasise
about men who are:
Pretty-boys;
Slim;
Muscular (like a swimmer, not a weight-lifter);
Fashionably dressed;
Patrician;
Tight-fitting trousers;
Attentive;
Wealthy;
Powerful;
Confident;
Popular;
Makes her laugh;
Takes charge;
Can discuss his feelings occasionally;
Yet isn't a wet dish-cloth.
Women will discover that men fantasise about:
Hussies.
(Sorry, I couldn't resist that.)
Men fantasise about women who are:
Pretty;
Good size bust;
Exotic (foreign);
Flirtatious;
Tight-fitting top;
A hint of underclothing 'accidentally' revealed;
Just might be a bit 'naughty';
Laughs at his jokes;
Has a strong personality (extrovert, introvert, doesn't
matter).
Ladies: Men may bed a hussy, but they tend not to marry
one. They won't bring a wildcat or crazed neurotic home
to mother.
For men, physical types vary. Not all gentlemen prefer
blondes. Beauty is a matter of proportion. YOU may think
your nose/bottom/breasts are too big/small. Don't listen
to your neuroses, or female friends who try to subtly
undermine you, or lie to you to boost your confidence.
Get a few photos taken of yourself in tight clothes, put
said photos in a drawer for a week, then glance at them
again.
Your immediate reaction is probably the correct one.
Understand that men are in the grip of a powerful
compulsion. *Any* woman can be attractive to *some* man.
You just have to put yourself in his way. Staying at
home, keeping to the same circle of friends, the same
routine, won't help. Go to where there are men of the
calibre you desire. And look at them.
Gentlemen: You have to give the impression that you are
confident, wealthy, powerful, (and sensitive in private
with her). If you don't have these qualities, fake them.
Women need to see potential, and the origin of the word
potential is the Latin 'potentia', meaning power.
How will you know if a girl is interested in you? She
gives you a second glance. Try smiling. If she smiles
back, you're in!
It's a myth that men gain women by chasing them. Women
assess men, then give the big gits 'the come on'. You
just need the confidence to walk over and say hello.
If you can think of a witty remark, make one. If you
can't, just smile. Say hello. Ask a pertinent question.
Then listen to what she has to say. Which, if she likes
you, will be a lot.
Lastly: don't over-think it. We are attracted to a
certain type, with whom we can make a better baby; more
robust, healthier, smarter, better adapted to its
environment. Other types just don't click with us,
'though we can acknowledge intellectually they are
attractive. It's a heart thing, a guts thing, and parts
lower down. The head merely gives its assent to a
decision already made.
The shame is not that you don't find your onely love;
the shame is in not making yourself available to your
destiny, and giving life your all. Go to!
About the author: T. O' Donnell http://www.tigertom.biz
is an ecommerce consultant in London, UK. His latest
project is an ebook on conservatories in the UK,
available at http://www.tigertom.com/conservatories-uk/index.shtml
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